So.. it’s another Friday night. And, here I am alone again, only with my guitar by my side and memories on my mind. I thought about writing poetry. Or maybe delve into my emotions and compose a song. But, I don’t feel like being creative. While others are dancing in clubs, drinking in a bar, or just out socializing with friends, I’m sitting in my room thinking about my life. Past, present, and future. I feel tonight is a night of reflection and as I feel my life is taking a new course in the coming weeks, I really want to be sure I am making the right decisions.
I know this blog won’t get too many likes, nor will it draw the attention of many readers. I’m writing this for me.
2016 is almost over. I started this year off with a bang! I got my first featured role in a film production. I was featured on TV in the Roots mini-series and on The Passion Live Easter television show. I got a chance to work with the awesome directors Rob Reiner and Ava Duvernay on various productions. I even met multiple celebrities who I never thought I would ever have the chance to speak to and meet face-to-face, like Oprah Winfrey, Tyler Perry and Will Smith. I even worked a job for the city of New Orleans, which gave me the opportunity to travel to Washington D.C. for the first time.
Then Summer came. The unexpected happened. My dad died. Nothing could have prepared me to withstand all that happened during the 2 weeks after his death. That’s all I have to say about that. I also broke up with my girlfriend. I really felt like we had something special. But, we were living a sinful lifestyle. I feel like we both tried to make it work, but I know for me the relationship was stressing me out, and I wasn’t able to handle her baggage as well as mine. However, I do feel like going through it all helped me to have a different perspective on dating.
Fast forward to now. Summer has ended, and I feel the cool breeze that let’s me know the holidays are coming soon :). I’m in a new season of life, it’s the middle of Fall in Louisiana and the weather is soooo beautiful! I’m almost finished with my MBA program. Even though I can see the end of the rainbow, I still have to keep pushing and focus on finishing my last 2 graduate courses. I’m also moving from New Orleans back to Baton Rouge for a variety of reasons. Most of all, I need to save money.
This might be weird, but I don’t care. If I saw myself sitting at a bar, or met myself studying at a coffee shop, I wonder what I would think of me. Would I say to myself, “He looks like a cool guy, I would like to be friends with him.” or “I don’t want to hear anything he has to say, look at him, he’s a loser.” A lot of people have invested in me, and I have made a large investment in myself. I’m not satisfied with being average in any way. And, I’m at the age where I’m tired of working hard to attain the things other people (who are younger than me) already have.
Despite all the experiences I encountered during this year (good and bad), I feel I really matured this year. I feel like the best is still to come for me, financially. I still have hope that my future is bright, career-wise. I still pray for my future wife and children to come quickly. I still feel my dreams of having a happy family, working a job that I love and making a difference in my community is attainable.
2017… I’m coming for you.