The word selfish, is usually spoken with a negative connotation. So, generally no positive person would ever refer to themselves as being selfish. Like, who jumps up and says, “I want to hang out with some selfish people today!” Yet, it’s clear that we all have some aspects of selfishness rooted in the nature of who we are.
If it takes you a long time to think about what was the last thing you did for someone that you didn’t have to do? If that’s a hard question to answer, then more than likely… you are probably selfish.
I don’t want to seem judgmental and calling people out, however, you can’t ignore the truth. Sometimes the truth hurts. Plus, being selfish is just a character trait, it doesn’t necessarily make someone a bad person.
Everything is all about how you look at it. For example, someone may feel I’m selfish because I didn’t give them something… maybe I didn’t spend time with them, or I didn’t give them money when they needed it. Well, you could look at my presumed selfishness as concerned care that’s interested in the betterment of their future, and thought it was in their best interest that I didn’t give them what they asked. And, I don’t feel that’s being selfish at all. Selfishness is not about the actions someone does all the time, it’s more so about the heart in which they do it in.
There is a trademark of thought that views women as being more selfish than men, this is not a perspective that I prescribe to, plus I always try to look at everyone as different and NOT label people by their race, class, or gender. But, I will in this specific case — I believe it’s not the fact that there are more selfish women than men, no, that’s not true. Well, then again, that may be true. Nevertheless, I feel men have an easier time separating their feelings from their actions… so, men are more apt to do things they don’t want to do, which is perceived as being less selfish. It’s not that one is more selfish than the other in everything they do, it’s just that, generally more women want to get their way.
The definition of selfish is, someone who is devoted to themselves, and primarily concerned with their own interests. Honestly, I can’t stand and I disdain even spending time with or around selfish people. I grew up with a sharing family — I don’t remember a time where my immediate family wouldn’t share something with me. There weren’t any labels on food in the refrigerator, and I shared everything with my brother, we shared clothes, we even shared friends 🙂 . Though it was a lot of pain, hurt, separation in my family, there is still a part of me that feels loved because I didn’t separate myself from them throughout it all.
The love I have for people is one of compassion… and to every reader who reads this, if no one has told you this today, I’ll be the first — I love you 🙂 ♥ .
June 25, 2012 at 3:12 pm
I love you too!
June 25, 2012 at 3:19 pm
@labelledphoenix thanks for the love 🙂