“Going nowhere fast, we’ve reached the climax. We’re together, now we’re undone. Won’t commit so we choose to run away… do we separate? Oh, don’t wanna give in so we both gave up. Can’t take it back, it’s too late, we’ve reached the climax.”

Those are lyrics from a song Usher co-wrote and performed called “Climax”. As I was driving today after church, the song came on the radio (I’ve been listening to more R&B lately btw, as I long to listen to words about love, or love music in general). As I was driving, I really started paying attention to the lyrics of the song. And, the lyrics really began to paint a mental picture of a lot of my relationships.

Going nowhere fast – Sometimes I can feel so lonely even while I’m in a relationship. And, it literally feels like I’m going nowhere fast! Or, I can feel this way when I’m approaching a woman and they give me the “side eye“. It’s like so many women have been hurt by guys they’ve dated or seen it happen to their friends, to the point where they are expecting men to hurt them. So, it’s almost impossible for them to trust, or have hope. And, I can’t be with someone who has trust issues.

We’re together, now we’re undone. Won’t commit… – I can’t count how many times I had an initial attraction with a woman and we really connected, then after a few weeks/months or so our relationship just kind of dissipates. And, though I invested in the relationship and wanted it to work out for whatever reason… it wasn’t meant to be and it didn’t work out. Whether she doesn’t answer phone calls, life created a separation between us, different career choices, different values, etc.

Don’t wanna give in, so we both gave up – No relationship is perfect. I see so many people who find it so difficult to sacrifice anything for love. They feel like they don’t have to deal with O.P.P. (other people’s problems)… but then they have trouble being honest, or want other people to sacrifice for them. I feel like I’m eventually going to have to give in and fight for love, if I want to be in a committed relationship. But, she has to be worth it 🙂 .

Climax – I’m 37. Right now, though I get a little lonely now and then, for the most part my life is great. I’m making the most money I’ve ever made in my life. I’m setting goals and living my dreams. But, I also know that this time in my life is only for a season. Life is short… I don’t have all the time in the world. I don’t have time for games. I’m at the climax of my life, and I need to make the most of it.

Below are a few questions, I want to ask this to my readers who are single (men and women) and desire to be in a relationship. Please comment.

  • What are you willing to do (or willing to sacrifice) for love? For example, are you willing to quit your job and move to another state, or country, to be with someone you love? Are you willing to sacrifice the relationships you have with your friends and family?
  • Do you feel that you can be happy living a single life? In my case, I know I couldn’t be happy being single, and casually dating, for the rest of my life. My convictions are too high when it comes to having sex outside of marriage, because even though I’m not a horny sex freak, I do enjoy intimacy and having sex. Plus I want children… I want a family.
  • Have you lost hope in finding love? A lot of people have lost hope. What can I say? It’s hard out here. All I can say is pray about it. That’s what I do.
svg5 min read

Jason Perry

I'm a black man with Christian values. A father to my son, a friend to those who desire my friendship, a lover of life and even more...


  • anaelrich

    April 17, 2017 at 4:49 am

    I have quit my job and moved to another country for love. It was a disaster and it’s not something I’m going to repeat anytime soon.
    I could be happy being single forever.. However, I want a child, and I wouldn’t be happy without having (biological) children.
    No, I haven’t lost hope…lol.

    • jason

      April 17, 2017 at 10:27 am

      ☺ you are definitely more courageous than me! I’ve been postulating the thought of moving and relocation, but I just don’t know if I could do it for the possibility of happiness and love.
      Thank you for sharing your heart.

  • academichustler1975

    April 17, 2017 at 3:00 pm


  • Maya Moore

    April 19, 2017 at 12:01 am

    Really like this blog and I’m a fan of this song! I like how you broke down the lyrics.

    I am willing to sacrifice myself for love. I’m willing to fight, endure hurt feelings and the misunderstandings that all come with love. I would move to another location for my husband, not a boyfriend, seen too many blow ups that way.

    I think I can lead a happy life single. I would still long to be married but I’m not going limit my life by saying I won’t be fully happy until I’m married.

    I haven’t given up on love. Maya Angelou has a great quote that says “Have the courage to trust love one more time. And always one more time. ” 😊

    • jason

      April 19, 2017 at 6:45 am

      Awesome! Thanks for sharing ☺. I asked those questions specifically because I’m learning the importance of being honest with myself.
      I’m smart and wise enough to know the right things to say and do, but I also need to be real, and identify my limitations and weaknesses so I’m not putting myself in a situation (or investing in a relationship) where I have good intentions but my heart isn’t in it.

  • abeautifulintellect77

    April 21, 2017 at 10:40 pm

    I am willing to move to another city, state or country to be with the one I love. I would sacrifice anything(family and friends included) that didn’t serve my purpose for a meaningful and positive life.

    I do believe that I can be happy living a single life. I don’t feel that I am at a place to begin casual dating as I am taking the time to “know” me after a lengthy relationship that wasn’t right for me. I am not interested in sex outside of marriage as I believe in “soulmates” and also “soul ties”.

    I have not lost all hope in finding love but I will admit, there are days when emotions lead and the need to experience intimacy and affection arise. It is a constant process, one where you remind yourself that you want “Plan A” not “Plan B” for your life.(Taken from “The Wait” by Meagan Goode and Devon Franklin.

    Awesome post. All the best to you with “Jason’s Journal”

    • jason

      April 21, 2017 at 10:57 pm

      Thanks for commenting! I feel it’s always good to take time to reset after long relationships.
      I really hope you find your soul mate. I’m still on my journey to find love.

  • Miss Felistas

    July 4, 2017 at 9:28 am

    I’d been off WordPress for a while and catching up on your blog has been great.

    Anyway, to the questions:
    I am willing to quit my job and/or move to pursue a relationship. However, compromise is 2-way and the other party must be willing to do the same as well.
    I do have a problem with a compromise on family/friends……these are the only networks that are constant in most people’s lives and to cut them off because of a relationship I don’t think I’ll be able to do.

    I couldn’t be happy being single forever! I love to love. I love to give my all and to receive one’s all and I definitely want to fall in love and remain loved up forever!

    I haven’t given up hope, regardless of what I have been through in previous relationships

    • jason

      July 4, 2017 at 9:56 am

      Just read your new post too ☺
      That’s real! Compromise is a 2-way street, but it’s rarely equal. Someone always will feel like they sacrificed/compromised more than the other.
      I honestly feel like my relationship status will soon change. As I eventually will have to make a decision on what I want… and invest in it. And only time will tell if I made the best decision. The question is, will true love, respect, or what will be the major factor in my decision-making process.


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This is my journal, my journey, and my perspective in life – JP

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