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Beauty vs. Sex Appeal

Almost every time I log on social media, I scroll across women posting sexually provocative images and/or videos. The attention sexually appealing women get on social media is insane. I would dare say there are women who have millions of followers on social media, just because they are essentially selling their body for attention. This is why I feel many younger women have trouble understanding what men want, and realizing there is a difference between beauty and sex appeal.

Beautiful women get my respect. Women who are sexually appealing get my attention… and my attention comes and goes.

When watching some of the video clips from the 2022 BET Awards earlier this year, I was appalled. Seeing homosexuals proudly flaunt their sexual preference through fashion style and appearance, and a few women adorning shameful and tacky styles, caused me to lose respect for what was once a classy event.

One bad apple spoils the whole barrel.

Lil’ Kim performed at the event. I remember how cute she was as a young woman. Now, she truly looks disfigured (image below). But, she wasn’t the only person at the BET Awards who looked foolish. I won’t even speak or share their images so not to spark any extra attention.


What is beauty? How does one determine beauty?

The dictionary defines beauty as a combination of qualities, such as shape, color, or form, that pleases the aesthetic senses, especially the sight.

Beauty lies in the eye of the beholder. I totally understand everyone has their own unique preference when it comes to what they deem beautiful or attractive. Great.

Subconsciously I believe we all have a “ranking system” of beauty, whether we acknowledge it or not. Words such as: gorgeous, fine, cute, pretty, etc. all refer to types of physical beauty. Recently deceased image consultant Kevin Samuels would oftentimes ask women on his show to rank themselves.


Beauty is truly a facet of excellence. It requires excellence and discipline to eat healthy, exercise, moisturize our skin, condition our hair, etc. I love this “now and then” image of Meryl Streep (seen below). Seeing the image of her at 27 and 72, side by side, makes me appreciate her beauty. As she has gracefully aged in life.

Image of actress Meryl Streep

I acknowledge the growth in cosmetic surgery market. More people are emphasizing their appearance, and becoming more self-aware of their aesthetic imperfections due to our digital and social media dominated society. I know a few women who have paid for cosmetic surgeries, yet still struggle to pay their bills month to month. And, we all know about gender affirmation surgeries. This all should be very concerning.

We all have scars and imperfections. I appreciate a woman’s natural beauty. I hope no one has ever told you what Shug told Celie in The Color Purple“You sho’ is ugly.” But, even if they did… it still doesn’t matter. Because everything God created is good and beautiful, and how you see yourself matters more than how others see you.

Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.

Proverbs 31:30 (NASB)
svg4 min read

Jason Perry

I'm a black man with Christian values. A father to my son, a friend to those who desire my friendship, a lover of life and even more...

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This is my journal, my journey, and my perspective in life – JP
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