Presentation is everything. If my world makes something out to be appeasing or good, then naturally I would think that it’s cool. Even Satan, the king of deceivers, made Adam and Eve think that it was cool for them to eat of the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Now just to be honest, it’s not that I was manipulated or that I was fed the understanding that being single was the thing to be growing up. But, throughout most of my 20’s and even my early 30’s I really couldn’t understand or see the ramifications that came along with living a single life. Or how not investing my time and energy into creating dating relationships with women, would cause me to be more introverted and eventually hinder me from being one of the things I so desire to be… which is a loving husband.
But, isn’t that what everyone says, “I wish I would’ve known this before blah.. blah.. blah.., and I wouldn’t have lived life this way“, or “If I would’ve known the future, I would have done this or that differently.” Well.. it’s true. If I would’ve known that I’d be 36 years old and still single, I would’ve changed how I went about making decisions in life and my career. Nevertheless, in my mind and not that I judge others, but I do feel that 36 and single is much better than 36 and divorced, or 36 and unmarried with multiple children, because all of those scenarios could have easily happened to me.
There are a lot of things that suck when it comes to being single. What sucks about being single the most to me is Friday evenings and the weekends. It’s on those days that I feel the most alone. I even begin to think about my past girlfriends or other relationships. Think about what I could’ve done better or better yet, what I should’ve done. Then I call someone to flirt with and all I can get is a ring tone and their voicemail, because they’re either ignoring me or out with someone else. When all I really want to do is to wrap my arms and legs around my boo thang and solve the world’s issues while watching movies.
Believe it or not, there are a lot of men and women who prefer the single life. They feel the single life has sooo many benefits! From what I hear FREEDOM is the main reason why living a single life is preferred. People want the freedom to have more options to choose from in their love life. They want to date whoever they want, and whenever they want. And, I get it. I totally understand their perspective. However, usually people who feel that way either have commitment issues or they probably don’t value marriage. I’m not like them. In my eyes… what is dating, if it isn’t done with purpose of getting married?
I’m just not content living a single life. And, though I have options… no one is with me right now. I suppose I just wish life and dating was easier. I have no more words, so here’s a short poem… as I just decided to be poetic.
You’re fortunate enough to live a life that’s good,
Give thanks because you did all you could,
Nothing in life ever goes the way you think it should,
You were fortunate enough to be loved, but not fortunate enough to have it all.