In the past month there have been over 30 well-known and widely respected men who have been accused of sexual misconduct, rape, or some form of sexual harassment to women (click here). One of the things that stand out to me the most is that these men are not just the common perverted music producers who are flirting with their young attractive female artists… some of these men are well-respected men in their 70’s and 80’s!
These allegations are coming so fast and most of them occurred so long ago, it’s difficult for me to truly know how to react to them. And, no one is exempt from being accused. Women are accusing men who work in almost every professional industry, starting in entertainment, non-profit organizations, churches, politicians, and even our President is not exempt.
As I think about how our society demonized Bill Cosby last year, when he was accused of sexual assault to multiple women over 20 years, before he was even charged (the case eventually ended in a mistrial). It lets me know that this is a big deal for these men, regardless of whether or not they are charged. They will be publicly scrutinized for years… and some have been fired from their jobs already.
Do I feel all these sexual harassment allegations are true?
Honestly… NO, I don’t believe all of them. However, do I believe most of them? YES, I do. That may sound sexist, but remember there are 2 sides to every story.
Let’s state the facts. It is definitely true that oftentimes if the opportunity presents itself, a man will take advantage of woman regardless if they are attracted to them or not. Men in leadership positions, men with influence, men with power… regardless of their character, religious affiliation, moral code, or integrity… still make mistakes.
Also, we can’t ignore that sometimes women will use sex as a way to get what they want. Nevertheless, the main reason why I don’t believe all of the women who made allegations is that the law requires you to file any discrimination case (including sexual harassment) within at least a year after the incident took place (click here). And, I feel if someone has been violated against their will by someone well-known, especially if they were raped, sexually harassed by a powerful person, I just can’t help but to feel that they would’ve filed a complaint or gone to the police, or done something… if they truly wanted justice. And, not all people who have been treated unjustly really want to go through the process of fighting for it.
Should these allegations of sexual harassment result in termination or the public harassment of those being accused, before they have been found guilty?
Not in my opinion. I feel like someone’s career shouldn’t be judged by the court of public opinion. Who knows if the accuser is lying? That’s not justice.
Why are these women waiting so long to have the courage to make their allegations known?
I do not know… I have no idea, when it comes to answering this question. I don’t know why someone would wait 20 years to bring up something that they may not can prove in the court of law, and even if they can prove it, they may not get anything from it except personal satisfaction. If I had a female boss, and she touched me on my genitals 20 years ago, I would just try to forget it ever happened… seriously!
Why are most (if not all) of the sexual allegations made which are taken seriously, are being made by white women?
I was thinking… I would imagine that women (of all races) have faced sexual harassment at one time or another. So, why is it that most, if not all of the women who are making these allegations are white? I don’t know. Is it because women of other races may not be as respected or trusted in our society as much as white women? Or they have more to lose if they made public allegations against their superiors. Some may think this is a racist statement, but I don’t feel it is. I just feel that it says we still have a ways to go in our country if we want equal rights for all.
No one can deny that sex is one of the top sellers in society. Things which would have been deemed sexually explicit just 30 years ago, now airs regularly on almost every television station.
I honestly feel more sexual assault allegations are coming. They are becoming more common due to three main reasons: (1) the easy access of sexually explicit content to anyone with an internet connection, (2) monetary gain or to demonize of someone for political/social reasons, and (3) though people have been sexually assaulted since the beginning of time, now society have given more people a stronger sense of confidence that their allegations will be respected.
Let’s be honest… how many times have you done something which could possibly be misconstrued as sexual harassment? Whether it’s giving a hug or kiss on the cheek to someone who doesn’t want a hug at work. Or, maybe you sat too close to someone at an event, and they were uncomfortable… There are things that may be a culturally appropriate greeting, like a hug and kiss, are now also considered as workplace inappropriate behavior.
Anyway… one thing I can’t stand are lying unrepentant unapologetic prideful people. Though I don’t like to see bad things happen to anyone, and I try my best not to judge others… I don’t feel sorry for people who are held accountable for sexually violating other people, especially those who take the innocence away from young boys/girls.
Luke 8:17 – 17 For all that is secret will eventually be brought into the open, and everything that is concealed will be brought to light and made known to all.
December 4, 2017 at 1:47 am
you have some valid points. But not every man will take advantage of a woman if the opportunity presents itself, it’s like that with men who have some type of ethics or personal moral code.
Every job and position has a social factor where male and female work side by side from entry level to executive level. There are always some type of sexual activity happening on each level, the supervision, management and executive levels may have more opportunities then front line worker level both sexes collude in the activity.
Women coming out and claim they were sexual assaulted 20 years after the fact have their motive. But 20 years ago some of their version of the events would have been under scrutiny because some were in the intimate atmosphere and alone with the person who they say assaulted them. It would have been his word against hers especially if what took place was not recognized as an assault at the time it took place.
But blatant arrogance like the NBC newsman , everyone knew what he was doing yet no one said anything.
The news of the behavior of some men gets around yet the women still go with them alone knowing his reputation then they become another notch on his belt; Maybe a woman could best explain that behavior….
December 4, 2017 at 6:19 am
You’re right. Good points. I agree with you.
December 18, 2017 at 11:49 am
I’m glad to see you speak on this topic. I have so many thoughts on this rape cultural phenomenon…I will say this. There is nothing new under the sun. None of this surprises me. I believe some of these allegations are true based on my own sexual harassment experiences that I did not report because I was new on the job, or young and feared I didn’t have a good argument.
It boils down to personal accountability and power. If someone is not living an accountable lifestyle in their day to day the won’t when/if the opportunity presents itself.