Earlier this afternoon I was scrolling through various photos on Instagram on my cell phone. After seeing one of my friend’s posts, I recognized just how beautiful she is. It’s not that I didn’t think she was a pretty girl before today, but something about her in that picture made me double-click 🙂 .

Then my mind went back to this past weekend, where someone asked me the question, “why are you still single?” (I actually wrote a blog about this some months ago – click here) Because I was thinking the same thing about my friend on Instagram, “I wonder why she’s still single.” She is obviously attractive, she comes from a good family, she has a good work ethic, blah blah blah… then I thought to myself, the person who asked me why I was single was probably thinking or assuming the same things about me.

Our world can be so focused on keeping up appearances that we can forget what really matters, especially when it comes to dating and relationships. Everywhere I go I see so many beautiful women, whether I’m at church, at work, out shopping. So, what exactly separates one woman from the other to a man? Truly, this is different for each man, so I can’t answer that.

But, I can say that the women who think that having a pretty face and a nice body is all they need to secure a man, aren’t thinking wisely. This may sound weird, but when I think about pursuing a woman, I think about what do I want to eat? I want to eat something healthy, something that is going to give me energy, something that took time to prepare, and something that tastes good. I don’t want to eat a beautifully wrapped fast food burger that’s filled with preservatives, high in calories, and has too much fat and artery-clogging cholesterol. And the only people who want it are those who don’t have the ability to get anything better.

Regardless if you’re married or single, when you get to a certain maturity you understand that true beauty resides inside a person’s heart. No one wants to sleep next to someone who is arguing with them all the time or who doesn’t care about their values, regardless how good they look in a thong and cut-off t-shirt. And, one thing I’ve learned is that the right person for you may be someone who you overlooked 10 years ago when you thought you were ‘all that’, or when both of you didn’t have the courage or ability to recognize what real love looks like.

Now, this is just for the single people… Ladies, don’t get discouraged. Men, don’t take advantage of the moment. I know Valentine’s Day is coming up and many of you don’t have a Valentine to love on, to share time with, to hold and caress, and share your body with. Take this time to prepare yourself… go to the gym, read some poetry, study your Bible, volunteer somewhere, hang out with your friends and family, go to a singles event or social event… do something to encourage yourself while God is working to bring someone special into your life.