The holidays are swiftly approaching. In less than seven days Thanksgiving will be come and gone, and in another month Christmas will have followed suit. I wish I could enjoy the holiday season, and celebrate it the way I feel it was meant to be celebrated.
Eggnog and turkey, red sweaters and scarves, smiles and hugs, Christmas lights and red ribbons, Christmas trees and mistletoe, presents and time spent with those you love… oh the holidays how I love thee, let me count the ways :).
But, I feel a huge weight on my shoulders to spend equal time with both my mom and dad on the holidays. And that obligation mixed with my expectations of what the holidays could be like, many times hinders my enjoyment of it all. One good thing is that my brother will be coming to visit this Thanksgiving, so I can spend time with him.
I’m still learning how to manage my life. Last night I saw a theater show, where an African-American homosexual woman was acting out a performance based upon her own life. She acted out many of the tough issues she has dealt with in life, from being treated unfairly in society and being sexually discriminated against because she’s a black woman, to her homosexual lifestyle not being accepted by her family. The show was very interesting to me, and though I enjoyed the show, it makes me sad to know that there are people who go through life without feeling accepted or loved.
One positive thing happened this week. I met someone. We met working on a film together, and we have went on a few dates. When we first met, it wasn’t love at first sight for either of us, but I do feel she’s attractive and a good person. But… is that enough? Should I run headfirst into this relationship? I think not. I’m choosing to take my time. I don’t have to have someone to love for the holidays for it to be special. I hate to say it, but I’m honestly getting used to being single.