They Just Don’t Understand!

How many times have you heard someone say, “Ugghhh! They just don’t understand!” For me, I would say I’ve probably heard it an unfathomable about of times. Everyone has said it at one time or another. Whether it was said by a child under their breath to their parent or teacher, or a wife talking to her girlfriends about her husband, or a church member speaking to their friends about to their pastor, or an employee gossiping about their problems with their boss. The feeling that you are not being understood can change how a person perceives society or their relationships, and even affect their decisions.

I believe people who believe their friends and family understand them, have more peace and are more positive in everything they do.

Being understood has a lot to do with your ability to communicate your feelings and thoughts. Everyone knows the importance of communication in every facet of life. And, poor communication is usually at the root of the many types of issues that cause most break-ups, arguments, disagreements and fights. One of the things I hate the most is arguing and confusion. I can’t stand it. Which is why I try very hard to effectively communicate my feelings. And, I definitely value and appreciate being in a relationship with a woman who listens and understands me.

This feeling of being understood even goes beyond relationships. I feel that in our country there is a great concern by many African-Americans to have society understand the biases, discrimination, segregation, prejudices, and simply the daily plight of what it means to be a minority. It can be seen when we look at the pending situation with Colin Kaepernick and the NFL, and the establishment of #BlackLivesMatter. If you don’t know already… #BlackLivesMatter was established to bring more attention and understanding to why so many black men are imprisoned and killed by police, and also to create solutions to these issues.

I have come to the conclusion that our main desire shouldn’t be to be understood, but to be respected and loved for who we are.

We are all different. And, there is a beauty in our differences. I know there will always be misunderstanding that will occur in relationships. Even the best of friends and the closest of siblings will at one time or another experience miscommunication. This happens because we all go through changes. I’m changing now, as I am constantly growing as an individual, learning new things about myself, and adapting to a new season of life.

So… I feel that no one will ever truly understand me except God. And, I can’t ever expect someone else to truly understand my plight in life or agree with my decisions, no matter how well I communicate my feelings to them. But, I do expect and desire people to respect me, and my opinions, because of who I am. And, if nothing else… I am a child of God.

svg4 min read

Jason Perry

I'm a black man with Christian values. A father to my son, a friend to those who desire my friendship, a lover of life and even more...


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  • Alex

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This is my journal, my journey, and my perspective in life – JP

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