As a young child growing up, Charlie Brown was one of the most beloved cartoons. I don’t know why I liked Charlie Brown so much. I suppose I just identified with it because I enjoyed reading Peanuts (an illustrated comic strip) in the newspaper every day, or maybe I was also just a normal depressed kid who lived in a normal neighborhood… like Charlie Brown. Nevertheless, I loved watching the film, “A Charlie Brown Christmas” every year and when I hear the song, Christmas Time Is Here… I’m immediately reminded of my childhood.

As a father, I desire to create traditions and joyful memories of Christmas time. However, I struggle to believe I’m doing a good job at creating family traditions or holiday memories. Christmas has never truly been about gifts for me, but mainly about spending time with family and friends. As I lay on a bed at my mother’s house by myself, and I listen to my son talking with my mom while the music of a game he’s playing on his IPad echoes throughout the house… I find myself feeling alone as I reflect on the past year.

I don’t have the right words to truly express how I feel right now, as I don’t want to sound as if I’m unhappy or depressed. I’m actually in good spirits. The weather outside is sunny and cool. I’m blessed. All my needs are met. Although like most single adults, I wish I was married or in a loving healthy dating relationship. However, I’m definitely happy I’m not in a toxic relationship.

Since I have the time… I will write a poem about Christmas this year.

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Christmas Time Is Here

Christmas time is here.
It’s my favorite time of year.
My birthday is drawing near.
Friends and family are spread out everywhere.
I pray they are well as the travel here and there.
Some of my dearest relationships have past,
They forever live in my heart, though their souls have found rest.
Sharing love and buying presents fills the void created by their absence.

I don’t hear the sound of jingling bells.
I am grateful and content with whatever today has to offer.
I don’t need any more presents.
All I need is love… I long to feel its presence.
I’m blessed to have my health, which is something I can’t buy.
God has blessed me this year.
For many people this time of year can be rough.
However, I’m blessed to see my son and mother smile today… and that is more than enough.